When Ministry is Messy by Lenora Grayson

Ministry. It can be blissful, but it can also be burdensome. People are human, sinful by nature, and forgetful of God’s goodness. 

We’ve all heard the saying, “Hurt people, hurt people!” And if you are leading in any capacity in your life, you will not only be the direct recipient of this unfortunate truth, but you very well may be the one hurting someone else. After all, ministry leaders are human, too!

So what do we do with the days that are messy and hard? How do we respond when the day doesn’t live up to our fairy tale dreams of how ministry to others daily should look? 

These questions remind me of Moses, who led in a time when leading others was very messy, over and over again. The Israelites would take one step forward in their faith only to take two steps back. They acknowledged the goodness of God and His provision in one breath, only to complain about what they didn’t have and how they wanted to go back to Egypt in the next. 

Strong complaints would rise against their leader, Moses. Although we know their complaints felt personal to Moses, their accusations were leveled at the Lord. We can see such a pattern of this behavior and the reality of messy ministry in Numbers chapter eleven as Moses’ people are again unsatisfied with him in their wandering. And don’t we all fall into this pattern in our lives at times? Don’t we also complain, rebel, and wish for our former things.?

I love what happens in Numbers eleven. Although provoked and irritated with the people in many instances, Moses always settles back into grace for them. We see a repeated pattern of him hearing the people and listening to them, realizing that only God can provide what they need, knowing that he alone can’t carry the burden, and interceding on their behalf for God’s miraculous help. We can see this same pattern with the people we lead today, and it points us to do these same things to care for ourselves and those we lead.  

After walking the ministry road for over twenty years, I’ve learned that being frustrated with others is inevitable. But just as Moses, we must always do as Pastor Johnny Hunt says, “not err on the side of grace, but live on the side of grace.” This advice becomes easier to follow when we realize our own great need for daily (or minute by minute) grace and when we recall our humanness. 

What I have found to be true in ministry and dealing with hurt people is that sometimes what they want and need is to be heard in their hurt. Sometimes they need the ministry of your presence, you sitting quietly with them in the challenging and messy parts of life.  

Just as God led Moses to realize that he couldn’t provide what the people needed, He showed him the importance of having people around him to share in his ministry. We will all need others to help carry the burdens. God never intends for us to carry that weight in isolation. Burnout will be inevitable when we choose to lead in this way.

Most importantly, we can’t forget to meet with God alone in the stillness as Moses did to pray for our people. There will be issues so challenging that you won’t be equipped to handle and can’t tackle with your human strength and wisdom. It will take total and complete dependence on the Spirit to give you a fresh word for the people. We must depend on that. And as we all know, with the crazy busy that ministry can be, these times to sit still and be alone with God can be a challenge. 

In your busyness, be sure to lead your own heart first. Don’t neglect to spend the time to rest in the grace and good news of the gospel that you are pouring into others. We must take the time to truly rest in Him and let Him refill us before we can pour out to others. Our usefulness to those we influence is closely tied to our choice to spend time personally with our Father. 

In his book, Awe, Paul Tripp says, “A person in ministry who wakes up every morning to the burdens of a job description and not to the joy of God’s awesome glory is a ministry person in trouble.” We can only minister well publicly when we care well for our hearts privately. 

We must be led intimately by God before we are ready to lead others.

Our primary job in leading is not to solve all of the world’s problems on this side of heaven but to help redirect hearts to the promises and character of God. 

When we focus on these two things, our problems will pale in the light of His trusted goodness and provision. It is then that our ministry becomes our delight!

Lenora Grayson has served alongside her husband, Chad, as a Senior Pastor’s wife for over 20 years.  They are currently serving at Life Community Church in Jamestown, NC.  Lenora has learned through great adversity how to suffer well, relinquish control, and trust her redeeming Savior, because He is good!  She has a deep passion for ministry to and discipling women and girls to follow hard after Jesus and take serious His call to holiness.  In her free time she enjoys traveling with the Chad and the kids, running, bargain shopping, and reading. Lenora works with the elderly as a physical therapist a few days a week and leads the Life Ladies ministry to women at her church .  She delights to be called Mommy by Annlee, Deuce, and Asher.

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